
The need for a ritual is innate. We need ritual to enable us to connect with our deepest thoughts and feelings, our nascent hopes and our debilitating fears. We need it to re-connect us to our changing bodies and to our changing relationships, to help us create a language that authentically articulates our experience of ourselves in the world and to speak that language both to ourselves and to those closest to us.
Isabel Russo – Head of Ceremonies, British Humanist Association
What Are Rituals?
Rituals are more than just a pretty feature for wedding pictures. They pay homage to cultures and traditions as every country and every nation in the world has its own heritage.
Throughout human history, rituals have been created to express the need to mark and articulate moments of transition and meaningful experiences, as they can connect us to our deepest humanity. Our ancestors have crafted rituals powerful enough to last through ages and if you think about it, even nowadays we all have rituals that we put into practice in daily life.

A wedding ceremony, be it civil, religious or secular, as one of the major moments of social and emotional transition in life, represents the union of two people but also the coming together of two families, often from different cultures.
Wedding Traditions & Unity Rituals
Unity rituals can be a significant part of the wedding ceremony, representing a deeper meaning of two becoming one, as a unique and creative alternative or along with the traditional wedding rituals, such as the exchange of rings. But that’s not all: sometimes rituals can be incorporated to recall a spiritual aspect of the ceremony, to honour or to give thanks to someone in particular, to carry on the tradition or pay homage to a culture, or to symbolize the merging of two different backgrounds.

Incorporating a meaningful ritual in your wedding can be a great way to give an overall picture of your relationship, express your vision and intentions for the future or pay homage to your roots and culture. But as every ritual has its own meaning and history, it is important to choose carefully. It has to be something that truly relates to your story, your cultural background or your personal beliefs, otherwise it will just look like a clumsy misguided attempt to be original by all means.
Choose Your Ritual Wisely!
Since I started my studies as a professional Celebrant, I’ve seen and heard of many rituals being conducted and performed without knowledge of their deeper meaning or a relevant connection with the couples’ own background and heritage. And that’s because nowadays it’s easy to pick a ritual and include it in a wedding ceremony; if you search the web for inspiration, you have a multitude of popular rituals and “how to” at your fingertips. But if you wish for your ceremony to be meaningful and heartfelt, that’s something you really should avoid!

Most of the times couples are offered a list of rituals to choose from, that are irrelevant or worse, in contradiction with their actual background or personal interest. Worse still, some couples are pushed into including a ritual just because “it’s a nice touch”. It can be a nice way to personalize your wedding day and a great opportunity for some unique pictures, for sure! But if it’s not somehow related to who you are as individuals, it may be confusing for your attendees and might give an inadequate context of your relationship and commitment. A borrowed and mismanaged ritual is likely to seem staged or insensitive and even offensive to some cultures.

So if you’re thinking of incorporating a unity ritual in your wedding ceremony – be it a groundbreaking gesture or a deeply rooted cultural custom – don’t just settle for the overused sand ceremony or a random handfasting ritual; talk it over with your Celebrant or Officiant – but don’t let them convince you into having one by all means! On the contrary, they should help you choose the kind of ritual that’s most significant and in line with your cultural background, love story or personal interest. Or even custom-design one that is appropriate for your, if needed be: and believe me, there’s no limit to creativity when it comes to unity rituals!

How choosing your Officiant can make a big difference to it!
You’ve come a long way from the moment you have decided to get married. All the planning, the details, the sleepless nights doing research and pinning posts about wedding styles, table settings, floral decorations, wedding gowns and centerpieces. Well, looks like you did a great job thinking about every detail: the guests, the music, the dress, the entrance, the cocktail, the party, the cake and all the rest of the – apparently never-ending – things you’ll need for your wedding, but what about your Ceremony? I mean the actual part of getting married. Most of the times it’s being lost sight of, when actually it’s the one thing that should never be left up to chance.

Now I know that being caught up in planning a wedding, especially if you’re thinking of doing that abroad, makes it very easy to lose sight of something that’s really important, and many couples are clueless of where to start and what to think of first. For that and other million reasons, it would be advisable to ask for the precious help of a good wedding planner. However, if you want to make sure you’ve got everything under control yourself, it’s vital that you understand the importance of what you and your beloved are about to embark on.
What makes the perfect wedding?
The details of a wedding are countless, we’ve already said that, and you’ll want them to be taken care of by inch, so that your guests will be impressed by the gorgeous setting, will have fun and will keep a good memory of your special event, forever. Nothing more true than that! But from my experience, I can tell you, of all the things your guests will see, hear, eat and do on your wedding day, it’s actually how they felt, that will resound forever in their mind.

They won’t remember the person who served them at the table, or what they had for dinner, but they will surely recall the great taste of what they ate and the big laughs they had with their diners, as well as they won’t remember the exact type of very-expensive-flowers in your bouquet, but they’ll surely keep a memory of you walking down the aisle with an armful of stunning blooms. Being able to give an emotional touch, to make people take part in your union and feel the love that you share, is not such a foregone conclusion, as some may think. You only have those fifteen-twenty minutes of reading, vowing and kissing to go through, but afterward, you and your guests will hardly ever remember the exact words that were spoken. As I said, it’s what you’ll have felt in that very moment, that will recall forever in your mind. And believe me, nothing is more disappointing, in an overlooked and clumsy handled event, than the awareness that it was your once-in-a-lifetime chance and it didn’t came out just the way you wanted.
This is why, a heartfelt wedding ceremony is the key to making your wedding day just perfect: unique and unforgettable. And for that, you might want to consider the help of an experienced wedding Officiant: someone to hold the reins of your ceremony all the way through. To be able to plan and take care of every detail and give your ceremony that special touch, that’ll keep your guests engaged.
Where to start looking?
So where should you start looking for a wedding Officiant? As I said before, your wedding planner is the best resource when it comes to choosing your vendors. However, regarding your Officiant, you should consider asking for more information and doing your own research as well. It’s your choice, but whether you decide to have a friend or a family member celebrating your union, or go for a professional and more experienced individual, there’s one important thing you have to keep in mind: that person will be the one with the greatest influence in setting up the mood of your ceremony, and consequently, of your entire wedding day!
First of all, you need to keep your mind focused on what you’re looking for: generally, the kind of ceremony you’ve decided on having, will define the type of Officiant you should be searching for. So start off by figuring out whether you’re going to have a modern non-traditional, rather than a religious, a secular wedding ceremony, or perhaps a civil, interfaith or same-sex union.
Next thing, you should consider their character and personal style – do they match your wedding’s tone? Make sure their religious or social beliefs (if required) are on the same page as yours, but most of all, choose the one that you feel more comfortable with, and make sure that the feeling is mutual!
Know your Officiant
It’s essential that you establish a deep connection with your Officiant before the wedding day, since you’ll be sharing a very intimate moment in time. You’re granting them with telling your story, witnessing your union and generally guiding you through the most important aspect of your wedding.
If what you’re searching for is a touching storyteller of your love, then beware of those who do not pay attention to your requests, and are not looking for a consistent conversation about you, your story and the reasons why you’re getting married and love each other. Loose those who won’t provide clear information about what they will or will not do with your ceremony, and those who won’t share their advice and experience with you, or send the final speech for your approval, previous to the wedding day (you should always have the last word on that, I believe.)
Always keep in mind that a good wedding Officiant should be the one you can turn to at any time, whether you have questions or doubts about anything regarding your union, or you’re just anxious and scared about the Big Day! So choose someone who is able to keep track of all the details of your ceremony: if handled perfectly, they can add up that extra something, that will make everyone take part in your union emotionally, and cherish that memory forever

Choose someone who is interested in telling your story: that moment is yours and should be all about you! And last but not least, choose someone who inspires you confidence: it will help you get through the whole ceremony thing stress-free and relaxed, with a big smile on your face!
Photographer – D2 Italy Wedding Photography
Planning – IWP Collection

It all began with a simple Hello,
a handshake, a glance and they’d soon fall in love.
But little they knew, the path they took on,
would lead them to bind and never let go.
They talked about life, about feelings and fears,
and as their love flowed, it all became clear.
Minutes turned into hours, than a day… a year,
and so they arrived hand in hand today, here.

Both happy and thrilled, united they stand
before family and friends to profess their true love.
A commitment to life, until the last breath,
That has been blessed from above.
They vow and they kiss while everyone’s moved,
and some even shed a few tears.
For they have been joined as Husband and Wife
from this day, through all the coming years.

They’ll walk hand in hand on life’s winding way,
together through both tears and laughter.
Because that’s what they call in the fairytales,
Happily ever after!

Wedding Planner – Blooming Eventi
Photographer – Luis Mendoza